It’s easy today for hurt women to label all men as”bastards” “beasts”, “Oppressors.” And the temptation to label back is big, yet the problem is neither men nor women, but sin – original sin.

ImageOne thing I like about writing.

You get to ask questions like these without  any door slammed in your face.

I mean, stuff like this,

“Isn’t Man supposed to be the head of a woman? Aren’t women meant to submit while their men provide leadership?”

Whew! Okay, there you go, I asked.

Try asking those in your lecture room or at your workplace and you’ll tell me.

If you are lucky to get away unstung, you will acquire a few names.

Chauvinist! Backward! Patriarch! Religious!

And “thanks” to the gender movement, especially in today’s academia, we now have a broader vocabulary to justify.

“Emancipation” “Patriarchy.”

Something about this movement that reminds me of a stanza in Destiny’s Child’s 2001 hit “Independent Women”

“If I wanted the watch you’re wearin’, I’ll buy it.

The house I live in, I’ve bought it

The car I’m driving, I’ve bought it

I depend on me, I depend on me”

Not a bad thing girl, is it? Girls are humans too, equal with men before God, uh-right?

Got a good education, yeah? Excelled better than the boy in school, yeah? So who’s this chauvinist man coming with his submission lingua –“Staying home? You mean she went to school for nothing?”


But what about looking at this way girl,

“This man of mine wasn’t created to dominate me, he was created to offer me leadership, we are not competitors, we are teammates.Yes, I may be equal or more  educated  than him but I  should let him take his God-given-position in the relationship/marriage, always,  when he fails, I will be a good team mate  and remind him of his position, I will be there to be his helper, as he captains this team, and that won’t mean I am a lesser player, no, just godly and submissive. I may climb the corporate ladder – yes, but my focus will primarily and always stay on my roles as a wife and mother. I won’t let cheques, late meetings and upcountry postings come in my desire to raise and nurture a great godly family. Yah”


Sinful girl


And for you boy, what about looking at it this way,

This woman in my life is given to me by God as a fellow heir to the gift of grace, (1Peter 3:17) I am stronger physically but that doesn’t mean snapping at her, she’s the weaker vessel (1 Peter 3:7),what about loving her as Christ loved the church (Eph 5:22)? I will be there to lead her towards Christlikeness, as she submits to me, I will also submit to Christ. Yes I am the provider in this home but my focus will primarily remain on my roles as a father and husband, loving, providing for the home and role-modeling to my kids. I won’t let my position in the house turn into dominance, I directly report to Christ. Yah.


Sinful guy


The above declarations represent the cold truth today’s academia would gladly highlight and Ctrl+Del.

That “sin” (underline it) is the central problem of maleness and femaleness –not just one sex. That equality does not mean sameness,Like columnist Dana Ryan argues.

“God created male and female in His image, which means they were created equal, but not necessarily the same. Too often people assume “equal” means “same,” but of course it doesn’t. A pound of feathers is equal to a pound of potatoes, but feathers aren’t potatoes.Women who set out on vendettas against men, hoping to prove their equality, miss the point entirely”

That men and women are different by design. That the spelling of submissive is not d-o-o-r-m-a-t, nor leadership d-o-m-i-n-a-n-c-e. These are profound biblical truths that have instead been substituted with the downside of men-women relationships. (That explains why you probably often hear refrences to domestic violence and chauvinism in gender equality public lectures)

For now, the world waits for sinful women and sinful men to redeem their God-given roles from the lies of both feminism and chauvinism.

May all the redeemed men and women take their place as “Fellow heirs in the gift of grace?”(1 Peter 3:17)

We are doing this for tomorrow’s strong marriages and whether you are a captain or defender, we are striving to become a complimentarian team here, remember?

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